Monthly Devotional

Real Gifts for Dad

June 2008

Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. (Song 8:6)

Leslie and Frank had been married for nine years when on Christmas day, they received their best present ever in the form of little James McAlister or “Mac.” Two years later, they were delighted by red-headed Jane Paige.

At a church gathering when Baby Paige was nine months old, Leslie expressed concern about how focused she was on the new arrival. Leslie relates that her friend Jean’s wise advice was a gift beyond measure. “Jean explained that God had another plan for me as Paige's mother. She advised me to make a place for Christ at the center of my life, but that after Christ, my marriage/my husband was the center. And I needed to make that abundantly clear to my children as they grew. She said, ‘without a strong marriage, your children will not have a good home to grow up in and not have good models to base their own adult lives on.’ Jean added, ‘One day your children will leave home. If you’ve spent a lifetime with them at the center of your life, what will you do then? Children will leave your home, but you and your husband will remain.’”

Leslie knew she and Frank had a solid marriage and her children were gifts from God. Still, there was something true in Jean’s words. Leslie had not been putting the same emphasis on her marriage. It was then she realized the best gift she could give Mac and Paige was a strong marriage.

Want some ideas on how to love your husband this Father’s Day? Read on for fun homework.

1.    Speak your husband’s love language. Gary Chapman’s book Love Languages explains the five love languages. The languages include: Physical Touch, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, Acts of Service, and Words of Affirmation. You can google a quiz to discover you and your husband’s languages. If you have a minute, try it out: http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/  or try the  30 second version. http://edified.org/myspace/lovelanguage.

2.    Date.

I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me. (Song 7:10)
My lover is mine and I am his. (Song 2:16)

Sometimes it takes creativity to keep the romance in a marriage, but it’s necessary! Swap babysitting responsibilities with another couple. You need to get away from diapers, dishes, and discipline and focus on one another. Give yourself a moderate budget and see how far you can stretch it with creativity and fun. Model for your children what a wonderful date should look like.

3.    Read some enlightening material! There are numerous books that open the lines of communication and keep life in your marriage. Try reading a chapter a week and implementing the ideas. I’ve included book selections on the website.

4.    Encourage your husband. Try saying only positive things to him and about him for one month. Nancy Leigh DeMoss’ Revive our Hearts Ministry has a website where you can download a Thirty-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge.
http://www.reviveourhearts.com/topics/downloads/index.php?id=9471

5.    Make every day Valentine’s Day. Be playful. The Word is exotic and a little erotic! How about this for an invitation note:

Come, my lover, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages. Let us go early to the vineyards to see if the vines have budded, if their blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates are in bloom— there I will give you my love.
(Song 7:11-12)

Or put your husband on a treasure hunt throughout your house; and you be the treasure he has to unwrap. One of my husband’s fondest memories is of the time I left a trail of clothing leading from the front door all the way to the bedroom with a note on the door saying for him to match my articles of clothing with his. He loved the anticipation and thrill of the chase. Sound risqué? No. Besides being a mother, you’re also a wife. Amidst all the diapers, dirt, and dentist appointments, remember you’re a woman and your husband wants to see you that way!

Try taking turns reading excerpts from Song of Songs. Whoever thought reading the Bible could be such fun? Here’s a Biblical place to start! Song 2:3-6, Song 4:4-6, Song 4:12-14, Song 4:16, Song 5:10-16)

“Love” is mentioned in 505 Bible verses, so it must be more than a Valentiney squishy feeling. Love is a decision and a choice. Make loving your spouse a priority and recognize the foundational benefits for your family.

Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned. (Song 8:7)

Lord, as our family grows, help me remember to nurture my marriage. Teach me how to love my husband and remind me to focus on his needs. Help me not to be so overwhelmed by the joy and surprises of motherhood that I forget my child’s father. May I understand loving my husband is a decision I make each day, not only on Valentine’s Day.

Copyright © 2008 - Ann Marie Stewart. All rights reserved.

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